Willie Chen, Period 5, 4/5/21, Day B

Willie Chen
4/5/21 
Period 5
Modern Mythology 2021

    In my interpretation of Grendel, I see the book as an outlet for Gardner’s own thoughts and nihilistic tendencies that he found to be unavoidable, whether they had been intrusive or a part of his core beliefs. It is for this exact reason that I believe he wrote the book from the perspective of the monster, a perspective often overlooked, as heroes are often celebrated in their triumph over evil instead. Viewing the world from the eyes of the monster, he offers us a different perception of human futility: one of frustration and selfishness instead of a glorified struggle. This perspective stands in stark contrast to the tragic beauty of human futility that is brought out in The Great Gatsby, which is not a happy story either. As described by the final lines of the book, it is of the human condition to reach forward towards a goal while being endlessly pushed away from it, which presents the side of nihilism asking “Why not?” Gatsby’s fatal pursuit of one-sided romance is comparable to the heroes who are willing to throw away their lives in pursuit of a legacy, as shown by Unferth and Beowulf. However, Grendel ridicules this heroism and deconstructs it by humiliating Unferth, which shows his disdain for that meaningless struggle. He also finds frustration at the beginning of the book as he watches the survivors honor and grieve for the dead. Grendel thus demonstrates another side to nihilism that suggests it is pointless and counterintuitive to continue meaningless struggle.

    Chapter 8 introduces the character of Hrothulf, who loses his father at a young age, leaving him in the care of Hrothgar. It is immediately apparent that although he is of a young age, he has already grown to have a spiteful and pessimistic view of the world. A connection can be drawn between Hrothulf and perhaps Gardner himself, who also faced a tragic loss from a young age. Gardner understood how trauma and loss at a young age could impact a child’s thoughts and emotions. In that sense, he projected his experiences and thoughts onto the character of Hrothulf. To Grendel, Hrothulf represents simply another human who has been corrupted from an early age, thrown into a position where he has to betray in order to advance himself. A parallel can also be drawn between Red Horse and the Dragon, who both serve as a source of temptation and newfound “wisdom” for Hrothulf and Grendel. Grendel’s encounter with the Dragon alters Grendel’s perception of the world around him by instilling in him a sense of nihilism and a resulting disdain for human behavior. Red Horse also shapes Hrothulf’s perception of the world by depicting government and societal repression as violence equal to that of rebellion. He instills the idea that systems implemented by governments to control their people are a form of violence in themselves and are therefore to be countered by violence in the form of rebellion, which pushes Hrothulf towards anarchy.

    After the class discussion over nihilism and the dragon, I mulled over the dragon’s philosophy on nihilism. In my attempts to wrestle or even reconcile with the idea that nothing really matters in the end, I came to the conclusion that I could never make sense of the idea that any change that may occur will ultimately be meaningless in the grand scheme of the universe. Unlike the dragon, I lack omniscience, so I don’t have endless knowledge of all that will happen. Thus, in the limited scope of my life, I can confidently say that certain things in my life DO matter. With this in mind, after a talk with a close friend, I noticed that instead of thinking that “nothing really matters if you think about it in the grand scheme of things,” I felt that if you do take a step back, different things matter.

    I cannot think of a time when this could feel more relevant, as everyone has been receiving their college decisions, celebrating hard-earned acceptances and grieving over devastating rejections. Truly, in the grand scheme of things, as the Dragon says, college decisions matter at all - after all, nothing does. However, it is clear that this offers virtually no comfort to a high school senior anxiously awaiting Ivy Day because they really do care about those decisions. How much something “matters” is thus determined by the scale that one thinks of it in. The long awaited college decisions are immensely important when you think about the time and effort that a student has put into their application and resumes, but if you take a step back, the college a person goes to is not the final judgement of their success (far from it). If the student could look forward to see what they will contribute to their field, the lives they may save, or the people they leave behind when they are gone, suddenly that college decision doesn’t seem as important. From our greatest hopes and dreams to our closest loved ones and friends, so many other aspects of our lives hold much greater importance. Our scope of knowledge is limited to the present and a bit of the past, so our perspectives are limited, but I believe that taking a page from the Dragon’s book and looking at our lives from a “grander” perspective will help me keep my head up in the rough patches. Thus, ironically, I’ve gleaned a sense of hope from the Dragon’s nihilistic monologue.